This book explores an emotional and unconventional journey of parenthood

When former journalist and author Preetha Sukhtankar brought her daughter Ayesha home in 2013 her happiness knew no bounds Eleven years later she is out with a book The Perfect Match Red Panda R250 which beautifully illustrates a story that explores the deep emotional journey of motherhood and adoption The novel is told from the perspective of both a mother and her adopted daughter capturing their struggles and ultimate lifechanging connectionA mother seasoned by lifersquos many experiences carries an unshakable emptiness within hermdasha void that only a daughterrsquos love can fill Elsewhere a young girl in an orphanage watches others revel in the warmth of family longing for someone who will be hers and hers alone When their worlds finally coalesce the connection is undeniable Together they find the love and belonging they had been searching for completing each other in ways neither thought possibleWhen Ayesha was younger Sukhtankar was looking for books to read out to her ldquoThere was just nothing available in the market Some of the ones I read to her like A Mother for Choco about a little bird who lives alone and goes looking for his mother had the wrong narrative The other international onesrsquo narrative didnrsquot fit either Everybody sugarcoats it and even uses animals not through humans So that was the other reason So I started to make up a story Like what Sushmita Sen did with her adopted kids She tells the story that they came from her heart lsquoThe hole in my heartrsquo was my inspiration to write this book and I had this idea from when she was twordquo says Sukhtankar who finally made it her COVID19 lockdown project and got illustrator Poorvaroid to work on the bookPreetha Sukhtankar and her daughter AyeshaldquoThe one thing I was sure wouldnrsquot be one of those sentimental sagas like Huckleberry Finn Itrsquos hardly a Pulitzer Prizewinning book and recently someone told me that itrsquos hardly a book I accept brickbats as well But I do think that it is an important story to be told for other parents like merdquoThe royalties from the book will go to Bal Asha the childrenrsquos home from where Ayesha comes Drawing comparisons in adoption procedures Sukhtankar feels a lot has changed A decade ago you had to apply through different adoption agencies Now itrsquos centralised through CARA Central Adoption Resource Authority ldquoCARA is tough It takes a long time but with the right reason Itrsquos so stringent and processdriven People think that you can actually walk in and pick a child Itrsquos nowhere close to that There is so much traffickingrdquo she says adding ldquoIt takes long but itrsquos much like trying right Yoursquoll feel the emotional pain through the process like anybody else does through IVF and surrogacy and when itrsquos donemdashyou forget about itrdquoSukhtankar always wanted to adopt ldquoSounds harsh but Irsquove always believed that is the natural thing to do Itrsquos everywhere but in India especially we have a big shroud around adoption People still say hurtful things to me I wish people knew what not to say to parents who have decided to take this journey Itrsquos just a different process from say an IVF surrogacy etcrdquoSukhtankarsquos first interview as a journalist was with a teenage Sushmita Sen fresh from winning the Miss Universe title ldquoWhen she adopted her first child it was a groundbreaking moment for adoption in India It gave the process a sense of legitimacy When successful individuals openly embrace the unconventional it shifts perceptionsrdquo she reflectsShe has collaborated with Karan Johar and others throughout her career showcasing diverse stories ldquoI didnrsquot want to limit this narrative to adoptive parents alone I wanted to highlight people whorsquove embraced unconventional choicesrdquo She cites examples like Kiran Rao whose openness about surrogacy inspired others and trailblazers like Mandira Bedi Sunny Leone and Raveena Tandon who normalised alternative paths to parenthood ldquoEach made a difference showing people that if they can do it so can we By talking about adoption openly and thoughtfully we can create a more inclusive empathetic world where all families feel valued and respectedrdquoShe believes ldquoWe are products of our parenting And we talk about it a lot right now especially with poppsychology Putting a child to bed with stories especially in the first couple of years is special for both We must add stories about different families that need to be told More books are being written on surrogacy or IVF parenting single parenting or gay parenting and thatrsquos a good thingrdquoNext she will explore the possibility of an audiobook about The Perfect MatchThings not to say to adoptive parentsHow lucky is sheShe is my child not a charity case Like any parent I feel incredibly lucky to have her in my life Children are not defined by how they join a familyDidnrsquot you want real childrenThis is my real childIwe could never do that You know blood is bloodhellipAnd honestly you shouldnrsquot if thatrsquos your mindset Comments like this imply that only biological connections are valid dismissing the deep bond between adoptive parents and children