A couple of changes

The world experienced a collective heartbreak recently when Bill and Melinda Gates one of the richest couples in the world married for 27 long years announced their divorce However in their note of separation the duo managed to set an example stating that theyrsquoll continue to work together for the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation which they started in 2000 ldquoOver the last 27 years we have raised three incredible children and built a foundation that works all over the world to enable all people to lead healthy productive lives We continue to share a belief in that mission and will continue our work together at the foundation but we no longer believe we can grow together as a couple in this next phase of our livesrdquo they noted in a statementSwapnil PangeConsidering that the Gates Foundation is oneofitskind having changed the face of philanthropic work in the world the stakes are high but the Gates have set a precedent for separating personal and professional lives Is it then possible for entrepreneurial couples who are on the brink of separation or are divorced to continue working together And how does one navigate the tricky terrain of emotional differences and past baggageReason mattersRelationship counsellor Swapnil Pange believes that the main deciding factor is the reason for separation ldquoIf they mutually decide to separate due to reasons such as longstanding incompatibility mdash then they are more likely to be influenced by logical rational thinkingrdquo he notes In such cases the partners may still continue working together However if the reasons are more emotional such as infidelity they may not want to continue as professional partners ldquoIn the Indian context there are other factors such as the joint or extended familyrdquo he addsThe way forwardHowever if like the Gates couples who were once married are inclined to remain partners in a professional sphere and ensure the growth of their venture isnrsquot hampered Pange suggests that they consult with counsellors on whether theyrsquore emotionally fit to do so ldquoSeek a psychologistrsquos opinion on whether you have any maladaptive personality traits that may create distress in the future Learn to keep the personal and professional domains separate treat each other as yoursquod treat any other colleague Take a break from tracking each otherrsquos personal livesrdquoSonali SinhaExecutive coach Sonali Sinha notes that like marriage business partnerships depend on trust and respect Emotional maturity is key ldquoA divorce which comes about due to one partner cheating can really shake the trust in the other person Although wersquod like to believe that we are rational beings we are driven by emotional and subconscious beliefs For a couple to be able to make this work it would need them to work on rebuilding trust and respect If the couple can have direct and transparent communication without dragging in past baggage a professional relationship may work outldquo she elaboratesOn the professional frontSinha advises that if the two parties are willing to set their differences aside for the business then these are some areas that they need to discussgtgt Shareholding If not already delineated itrsquos important to decide what the shareholding would be for each partnergtgt Roles The partners need to spell out their role descriptions and how any difference of opinion will be handledgtgt Board positions If itrsquos a listed company or a firm with external investors the partners need to decide whorsquoll have control on how many board seatsgtgt Obligations to creditors In case there is any bank or other loans with a guarantee they need to pick whorsquoll be responsible for making good that guaranteegtgtTaking care of banking Whether both need to sign or eitheror and what limits are there for bank transactionsgtgtDividend distribution Agree on how much dividend can be distributed Also discuss allowable expenses from the business for both partners upfrontAvoiding conflictEven the best of us let our emotions get in the way of rational thinking thatrsquos key for entrepreneurial success Herersquos how you can avoid conflictsgtgt Problems arise when we expect the other person to understand what we want without actually saying it out loud Learn to communicate directly without being passive aggressivegtgt In case of a conflict take a break and donrsquot act on your feelings immediatelygtgt Do not attach past events and their meanings to interpret the current behaviour of your partnergtgt Focus on your emotional wellbeing and pursue activities which keep you calm and focused There will be ups and downs while handling professional relationships with a separated partner expect and prepare for it But if you feel overwhelmed or are triggered definitely seek helpRocking CoupleHollywood star Dwayne Johnson AKA The Rock and his exwife Dany Garcia are another celebrity couple whorsquove remained a professional team despite calling it quits after an 11yearlong marriage Garcia took on the role of being his manager even as they were heading for divorce in 2008 and continued her job post their separationDwayne Johnson and Dany GarciaThe duo have also cofounded and run Seven Bucks Productions which has produced bigticket films Sinha notes that the success of their professional relationship rests on the strong emotional bond they wouldrsquove created early in their lives they were college sweethearts ldquoMore importantly Dany comes across as a levelheaded person Shersquos willing to challenge the norm and knows what she wants She probably sees very clearly what value she brings to the table and is very secure from that perspectiverdquo she added538 BNAmount spent by the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation on various causes till now27Number of years Bill and Melinda were married